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Sunday, December 30, 2012

Why She Hasn't Called Back

So you went out on a date with an amazing woman. Everything was going great and you thought she was really into you. You leave her a message the next day telling her that you had a great time and hope to take her out again soon. Now it’s been days since your last date and you haven’t heard from her. Why hasn’t she called? Is she busy? Not interested? Hasn’t gotten your message? Maybe you think you called her too soon.

The answer however is that she most likely didn’t feel about the date the same way that you did. Why? You didn’t connect with her on an emotional level. While most men focus on getting a first date, a second date is equally important. When you ask her out on a first date, you are trying to distinguish yourself from all the other guys hitting on her. You have to give her a reason to pick you to go out with. The same rules apply when you are on your date, when the date is over and she goes home, she needs to feel like she made a connection with you.

You get her to call back by making her feel connected to you, whether this is by sharing a laugh, a moment, or an experience. Men feel connected by sharing activities while women feel connected by sharing stories and emotions. How do you connect with her? Talk to her like you would with a friend. Pay attention to the details of what she says. Remember the names of places, people, or pets she mentions. Make your phone call personal. Instead of saying something like “Hey I had fun last night we should do it again”, go with something along the lines of “Hey I enjoyed our conversation about your trip to Mexico last summer. I know a great place that serves the best Mexican food that I’d like to take you to this weekend”. Let her know you aren’t like all the other guys. Give her a reason to want to call you back.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

When To Consider Marrige

When is the right time to consider marriage? This question is difficult to answer and in my opinion has no “right” answer. Marriage is a commitment between two people to share their life time together, become each others life partners. In my opinion you need to date for at least one year before you even consider marriage, but this doesn’t always prove true. Some married couples have known each other for a few months or even weeks and have had a happy marriage for years while others dated for 3+ years and end up getting divorced. It all comes down to how well you know your partner. Before you start thinking about when the right time to get married is, try to answer these questions first.

Can You Solve Problems Together?

Some couples are able to coast through dating troubles and are in for a shock when their first conflict hits while they are married. Conflict is an unavoidable part of life and it can destroy a couple who isn’t prepared and hasn’t learned how to deal with it properly.

Do You Take Care Of Each Others Needs?

An important aspect of marriage is “if it’s important to you it’s important to me”. People are naturally takers, so it’s going to take a great deal of effort to become a genuine giver.

Do You Trust Them?

A relationship is nothing without trust. Trust is one of the number 1 things you need to have if you plan for your marriage to succeed. If you don’t trust each other think twice about getting married.

Do You Want The Same Things In Life?

This is something that needs to be discussed before you two get married. You two need to be on the same page in terms of your values, priorities, and life goals.

Are You Financially Stable?

One thing few couples fail to do is make sure they are financially stable for marriage. If you are living with your parents or struggling to support yourself, you are not ready for marriage.

Marriage is a big step for every couple and you need to make sure that you and your partner are both ready for it before you take that step.

Sunday, December 23, 2012

How To Get A Second Date

Working up the courage to ask someone out can be a difficult task for anyone. Once you have worked up the courage and asked someone out most people would think the hard part is over. You still however, have a long way to go. Now that you have a first date, how can you make sure that there will be a second one? You would have gone through all that trouble for nothing if he or she just nods the whole time and you never hear from them again. People are a lot more nervous and less likely to act like themselves on a first date so it’s essential that you can get a second one. Read on below for some tips on how to get a second date.

Be Nice to Others

Be nice to the people you come in contact with. Don’t leave a bad tip or get unnecessarily angry at others. The way you treat others is how your date is going to think you will treat them. Being needlessly rude to anyone will ruin your chances for a second date.

Ask Them Questions

No one likes conversations that lead nowhere. Avoid asking them questions that will end up with a simple yes or no response. Instead ask questions that will get them engaged in the conversation and have them asking you questions as well. Make a mental list of topics if you think it will help you. For topic ideas check out my other post First Date Conversation Topics.

Pay The Bill

For guys, when the time comes offer to pay. Most likely she will decline but making a sincere effort to pay is usually good enough. Don’t be overly persistent, if she doesn’t want you to pay after you’ve made a sincere effort offer to split the bill.

Follow The 2 Day Rule

After your date, don’t contact them for two days. If you contact them any sooner you are only going to come across as desperate. Any later and you will come across as not interested. A simple “hey I had fun the other night” should be good enough.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

How To Hold Her Attention

Although most men would say getting up the nerve to walk up and talk to a woman is their biggest fear, what happens after should be what you are concerned about. After a few reassuring looks and signs, everyone can work up the courage to walk up to a woman and say hi, it’s going to require a lot more to hold her attention. Do you know what to do? How about which topics to avoid? Help on both of these can be found on my other posts First Conversation Mistakes and Picking Up Women (Do’s and Don’ts). Read on below to find out some of the best ways to hold a woman’s attention.

Conversational Spot

If you’ve successfully grabbed her interest, the first thing you need to do is find a good spot to talk to her. Lead her to a place where the two of you can talk more comfortably, she will be more likely to agree if she actually wants to know more about you. Holding a woman’s attention requires leaving crowds and loud music, it shows that you enjoy speaking to her.

Eye Contact

You shouldn’t have to continuously stare into her eyes, in fact that’s something you should avoid doing. Instead make sure to meet her gaze on a continuous basis. Eye contact has a lot to do with confidence and confidence is one trait women look for. Other traits can be found on Qualities Women Want In A Man.

Ask Continuing Questions

Don’t just ask her yes or no questions. You are trying to get her involved in the conversation. Ask her opinions on things. If she tells you what her job is then ask her a specific question about that. If you are doing it correctly she should end up talking more than you do, and that’s exactly what you want.

Focus On A Topic Of Her Choice

Don’t just go on and on about whatever you want leaving her just sitting there nodding her head. If she mentions something and seems particularly interested in it then focus on that. If she brought it up, how can she be bored with it?

Be Attentive

Pay attention to what she is saying. Find a way to bring it up later on to show her you were listening. If she makes a joke you think is funny or agrees with you on anything, make an effort to build on that compatibility.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Is Your Partner Lying To You?

Knowing if someone is lying to you doesn’t require you to have psychic powers or mind reading. The difference between a lie and the truth can be distinguished by your partner’s body language. Most people are unaware of the body language they give out since it’s completely involuntary. This is what makes it such a great tool in finding out the truth. The body never lies, so pay attention and see if your partner is exhibiting any of the signs below when being questioned.

Lack of Eye Contact

One of the biggest signs of deception is that your partner can’t look you in the eyes. Usually if someone is telling the truth they will give you their full attention.

Too Much Eye Contact

People who are good at lying know the signs that they give out, so they might compensate by making too much direct eye contact.

Speech Pattern

When people are lying they usually speak very hesitantly in a higher pitch than usual. They make more grammatical errors and slips of the tongue than when telling the truth. Their tone of voice also won’t match their facial expressions. Another thing to watch for is if your partner is covering their mouth. This can be something as simple as a single finger placed over their lips or having their hand over their entire mouth.

Contradicting Statements

If your partner is making contradicting statements that just don’t sound quite right, chances are pretty high that they are lying to you.

Change Subjects Easily

If someone is lying to you and you change subjects, it’s very likely that they are going to go right along with it. People who are telling the truth will stop you and ask why you changed subjects and want to go back to talking about it.

Overly Defensive
A guilty person will always act more defensive than someone who is telling the truth. If your partner is being extremely defensive or refusing to answer questions, they most likely are lying to you.

Of course no one can tell for sure whether someone is lying to them. It all comes down to how well you know that person and trusting your instincts. Keep in mind though that your instincts can be influenced by your own insecurities. It’s best to compare your partners normal behaviors to the ones they are exhibiting when you think they are lying and see how the two compare.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Checking Out Others While In a Relationship

It’s no secret that we will encounter someone attractive other than our partner, and we are going to look. It’s natural to look at someone you find attractive and there is no need to feel ashamed or guilty about it or see yourself as being unfaithful to your partner. But what do you do if your boyfriend or girlfriend is constantly checking out other people? Every time you two go out he or she is always looking around, not paying any attention to you. Is there such a thing as looking too much?

Although it is natural for people to look, there is a right and a wrong way of going about it. When you are on your own, feel free to look around all you want. Your partner isn’t there so you don’t have to worry about anyone’s feelings getting hurt. When you are with your partner however, you are going to need to be a little more discreet. A quick glance over is harmless, but if you stare, exchange smiles, or even look like you are undressing them with your eyes, you’ve got a problem. Not only is this disrespectful to your partner but it can make them feel hurt and unattractive, lowering their self-esteem.

A look every now and then is fine but if you find your partner constantly checking out other men or women it could be a sign that they are losing interest in the relationship. Start paying more attention to their behavior for any other signs that they might be giving off that he or she isn’t as interested in you anymore. Check out my post on Break Up Signs for help with that. If you have become tired of your partners wandering eye, then it’s time to talk to them about it. Good communication is the key to every healthy relationship. Let your partner know you feel upset by their behavior. If your partner doesn’t make any changes to their behavior, it’s pretty safe to say they don’t consider your feelings important.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Signs of a Bad Relationship

Are you happy in your relationship? Relationships can be far more complicated than they seem on the surface. You see a cute couple holding hands and assume they will be together forever, but before you know it they could break up and go their separate ways. What seems perfectly fine and stable on the outside might not be the case on the inside. Keep an eye out for hints of a bad relationship and fix them before things get worse. Not the hints that everyone sees such as arguments, but little subtle hints that only you or your partner might notice. How do you know what these hints are? Listed down below are the possible signs that you might be in a bad relationship.  

Loss of Respect  

Respect is an important part of every relationship. If you don’t respect your partner, they are sure to find someone who respects them and likes them for who they are.

Avoiding Conflict

When arguments and anger build up for your partner, you are more likely to distance yourself from them while they will have no clue what’s going on.  


Lack of communication will disconnect you and your partner from each other and soon neither one of you will have anything to share with each other.  

Taking Each other for granted  

This is probably the most common sign of a bad relationship. It’s easy to forget and take for granted all your partner does for you.  

Talking bad about each other  

How can you expect a relationship to work when you are trying to convince yourself that your partner is not good enough for you?